11/28/2010

We missed a week--sorry about that. You see, the snow started falling last Sunday night, and the excitement was just plain high. Teddy had the week off from school officially for parent/teacher conferences, but I (Willie) had to go to school Monday thru Wednesday. Well, that was the plan anyway. So a call came in from the school at 6:30 Monday morning that school would let out 2 hours early. What? I've still got to go to school with snow on the ground? Unprecedented I say. Okay, so I went to school, and got home two hours early, and good thing I did because that's when then snow, and the temperature, really started falling. Before we knew it, there was 6 inches of fluff on the ground, and the temps were in the 20's. So then Tuesday school was cancelled, and the parent/teacher conference. Then Tuesday night, Wednesday school was cancelled. You probably know the rest of the story.

The rest of the story: Thursday was Thanksgiving. Good thing papa got out on Monday before the real snow hit to do his shopping, otherwise it would have been chili and corndogs for thanksgiving dinner. Our friends came for dinner, and what a feast it was: Smoked turkey (on the rotisserie BBQ) and ribs (in the new barrel smoker), stuffing, roasted potatoes and golden beets, fresh home made no-knead bread and popovers, cranberry sauce can, salad, and DESSERTS--slab apple pie, pumpkin pie and CHOCOLATE MALTED WHIPPED CREAM!!!!!!! So as you can tell, not much of this stuff excited us, the willie and teddy set. I (Willie) ate ribs, potatoes, bread, popovers, and CHOCOLATE WHIPPED CREAM. Mommy made some curry chicken so Teddy had a good meal too. We played Magic for a long time with our friends and stayed up way too late. All in all, a very successful holiday.

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Do you ever get the feeling that you are being watched? I do, and you know, it's just creepy.

So, those of you who don't believe us about the snow, check this out. The snow on the table got to about 6 inches deep, and the wind was so fierce, the snow got everywhere--even covered the porch and got right up to the front door.

One of the best things that happened was we had marathon sessions with our new favorite game--Angry Birds. Papa broke down and spent 99 cents on the game. He was having too much fun slingshotting birds into big pigs who had stolen their eggs.

 Take that you egg stealing pig. SMASH!

 And that, and that. And that. You get the idea. Snow + no school + iPod touch = happy campers.

So usually papa would get out and at least dig around grey car and put on its chains just in case he needed to get somewhere in the car. Not this time. He just figured with the thanksgiving holiday and having done all of his shopping already, we were all in for the duration.

 Sounds good to me. Pass some more whipped cream.

 Whipped cream? Mine! (says Noah)

Not if I, Willie the human whipped cream vacuum beat you to it. SLURP!!!!!!

11/14/2010

So here's what's good: Cayenne pepper. I (Willie) can't say that Papa has been right about too many things, but cayenne pepper is one thing he was more than right about. It's good on everything--french fries, chicken nuggets, hot sausages, hamburgers. I'm trying it on everything. I was sniffing his 'rice bowl' lunch today and I said it smelled pretty good, and he gave me a taste and, whaddaya know? It was good. Kind of spicy sweet. Then he told me it had hoisin sauce in it. I always hated hoisin but I guess I have to think about it. I also tried some veggie chicken vindaloo. The fake chicken was too rubbery for me, but the vindaloo was really good. Speaking of vindaloo, we started watching Red Dwarf. It's pretty hilarious, especially some of the stuff the 'Cat' says. Teddy laughed a lot also, but will never admit it. Another thing about this vindaloo that was really crazy (and we can't figure out how Yves--the maker--got away with it. So it says on the package Vegan and O-U kosher pareve (a word which means neither meat nor milk), but on the back of the package under ingredients it says may have egg or dairy. WHAT?!? I don't think the O-U people are going to be too happy about fake pareve chicken vindaloo having dairy in it. You guys are gonna be in trouble.

Teddy had a band concert this week and his trumpet playing is getting really good--not just the random blatts but the stuff that actually sounds like music. Good going Teddy--you'll be blowing like Miles Davis any time now.

We got to see Tante boo boo for a little while tonight and she shared some origami links with me. Thanks Tante.

It was math night at middle school this last Wednesday and me and papa went to see Mr. Pounder in action, and he did not dissappoint, getting off one 'annoying child' and a couple of 'get moving son's. If you want the really inflammatory stuff he says, you'll have to contact me directly because I shouldn't post that kind of stuff on the interwebs.

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 Ya ya, origami, fold, spindle, mutilate.

Mmmmmm, cayenne. More. More. More.

Just keep your hands and feet away from his mouth, and that cayenne bottle. [Ed. note: it was fun watching willie power down the Louisiana hot sausage after his two hamburgers--it was so hot I thought he wouldn't finish it, but I was wrong.]

Pay attention to me. Me, that's me in the yellow shirt. Pay attention to me. Little brother talking. Hello, cute brother over here needs attention. Att-en-shun. Yup, that's what I need. Gimme some attention. You know you want to.

 Please, I need need need need some uh-TEN-tion!

 Ha, I've escaped his clutches and can now read in peace. Finally.

Until next time anyway.

Copyright 1997-2010, The Berman Brothers, Willie and Teddy. All rights reserved.

11/7/2010

Not much going on here. We did get to watch the Simpson's halloween specials from last year and this year, complete with commercials, but as usual, papa was quick on the remote so gunplay and such was on the entertainment menu for us.

Papa's been monkeying around with the internet connection and we occasionally find an open connection so we listen to video game soundtracks from youtube whenever we do. Yes, we know how to have fun. We've also been experimenting with Voice Control over Willie's iPod touch, and it plays the darndest things when you ask it to do something else. For example, when Willie says "what flavor is my ear" the iPod goes and plays some Lord of the Rings stuff. What does it mean?

The big internet news is that our 6 month experiment with Clear wireless broadband is over. They are one company that is clearly not ready for prime time. We give them 3 months until they declare bankruptcy based on their crappy service. So it's back to DSL for us, albeit at a higher speed, complete with our tails between our collective legs. But Papa's not done tinkering yet--he's working on some VOIP thing called Ooma (no, not Uma, but he can wish) that is part pyramid scheme and part miracle cure to the phone company's stranglehold on our phone line. We'll see how it works over DSL, cuz it didn't work well over Clear, but then nothing really worked well over Clear. Wouldn't that be ironic if the phone company's DSL line allowed us to cut our landline connection for phone service? Here's hoping.

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Behold, it's Annoying-Man to the rescue of this otherwise dull and dreary evening. Posing as a mild mannered, innocent younger brother, our hero prepares to leap into the teeth of danger.

Here's our hero poised behind his prey. Yes, Willie has little to fear to from our hero's mild manner, or does he?

BUNNY EARS! Yes ladies and gentlemen--Annoying-Man has struck again! Just when you least suspect nefarious activity is afoot, you too might be the victim of mirth and mayhem. A further word to the wise--don't accept so much as a jelly bean from this pajama'd crusader. The last fellow who did got 'skunk scent' disguised as licorice. CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

Copyright 1997-2010, The Berman Brothers, Willie and Teddy. All rights reserved.

10/31/10

Same old everyday stuff happening around here. Papa nearly burned down the house. On this hallowed eve we accumulated over 8 pounds of candy between the two of us (including the yucky stuff). Mommy and Papa had their 17th anniversary--which would make papa 6 years old when he got married--we think something smells rotten in Denmark, and we're not talking about the burning deck. Half of the clocks in the house thought it was the time-change day, and the other half didn't. It was kind of confusing, but alas for Teddy, it did NOT make it so that he missed Sunday School.

One unusual thing is that we got to watch a bunch of sports this week--we watched some world series games--the commercials are better during the Super Bowl if you're wondering--and we got to see the Raiders slaughter the Seahawks today. Papa was happy, and we were happy because we got some of those real sugar imported from Mexico Coca Colas. Mmmmm. And did we mention halloween candy? Yes? It's hard to remember due to our sugar highs. Which, by the way, we have learned, are a myth. 

We just finished reading the Lord Peter stories, and might be moving on to Poe, but then again, at some point we may just have to switch genres.... don't want to get in a rut, especially not one with all these Bad Influences....

I (Willie) finally finished my two literary analyses for the first quarter -- remind me to start earlier next time! -- and now have a lot more time to goof off. Yeah! 

And speaking of Yeah, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to great-aunt Hamburg (or was that chopped liver) -- that's a code name, but you know who you are!

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So Papa's friend Fergie gave him this smoker barrel with instructions to burn the inside of the barrel before using it, so Papa did that, and burned up part of the deck while he was at it. What did you think was going to happen when you put a hot coal filled barrel on 10 year old cedar planks? He's not too bright, but at least he had a fire extinguisher nearby, and the hose to put out the hot spots.

Anyway, the smoker got moved to the driveway where it was successfully tested on small animals.

Mmmmm, yardbird. Don't worry, it wasn't anybody we knew.

STOP that right this instant. I'm finding this carnivore behavior unappetizing. Actually I was on traffic patrol duty this past week and mommy tracked me down, camera in hand.

 Uh oh, the Georges have gotten an idea from Papa--they've cornered the moose in the bathroom, and it looks like they mean business.

Oh great, now what are they going to do with dead plush moose?


















We'd better not see what happened to that moose. We'll be safe just sitting here reading the comics--nothing bad or violent ever happens in the comics.

Got any floss? That plush moose meat got stuck in my bicuspid.

Hear no evil. See no evil. Speak no evil. Have no fun.

On second thought, I'd like to speak some evil about that guy having fun.

 Those Georges and the moose gave me a good idea for a halloween costume--the killer chef! And his faithful minion--Bad Omen!

 I take it back--it was a particularly good haul this year.

See these teeth? Well you won't see them next year. Hooray for too much candy!

Mine and mine--except anything with nuts or coconut. You can have those.

Any no tootsie rolls for me. And I second Teddy on the nuts things. Pee U.

10/24/2010

Cold. Getting colder. Cold. Did we mention cold? Papa seems to think that it's okay to leave the heat off until November--we're going to vote him off the island if he's not careful, then turn up the heat to full blast, thank you very much. Put on more clothes? How many more clothes can we put on? Of course this question doesn't count for Teddy who seems to think that it is his personal mission to only wear t-shirts and walk around in bare feet despite it being 63 degrees in the house. Cold.

Sorry there is only one picture this week--manipulating the camera with thick gloves just doesn't work well. We did put Snuff up on Teddy's fan to see what kind of centrifugal force would be required to spin him off. Needless to say, Snuff was not amused, but we were.

Papa went and saw President Obama speak with Senator Patty Murry on Thursday morning. He said it was a standard stump speech, but that President Obama really 'has it' when it comes to firing up a crowd. Of course the President also stopped at Top Pot doughnuts before the speech, but he didn't give any to us so we're not sure that how we'll vote. The fact that we're too young to vote does not enter into our thinking about this obvious faux pas. Will vote for doughnuts.
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Definitely cold. Mommy offered me her fingerless gloves so I could do my homework legibly, but I prefer warmth and illegibility. Wouldn't you?

Copyright 1997-2010: The Berman Brothers, Willie and Teddy. All rights reserved.

10/17/2010

Well, the sun is shining, but this does NOT mean it's warm! In fact, it's so cold, Teddy actually wore long pants today.

Willie spent a pretty fair bit of the day figuring out how to print two-sided index cards. Yup, that's right folks, they have to be typed and PRINTED. Never mind that this might take six or more times as long as actually writing them out. (And don't ask, why didn't we just print onto regular paper or stickers and slap 'em on the index cards... believe me, we still might, but darn it, this is supposed to be a house of technogeeks, at least some hours of the day, so you'd better believe we wanted to figure out how to conquer the ^#$%&^%^* piece of machinery that's supposed to be making our lives easier.)

W & T, in an accord of sorts to work toward more bits and pieces of independence, promised (and in fact also delivered) to make their own lunches this weekend. Do leftovers count? (Short-order chef says, YES.)

Of culinary note: buckwheat pancakes were tried by all and pronounced "Quite good" by one and "Not bad on the first taste but then there's this gross buckwheat aftertaste" by the other. Also, the usual sous chef got a little bit big for her britches and tried to make Hot & Sour Hunan all by herself ("selfie do it!"). It was pronounced "as good as the regular way" by one and "sauce is good but the chicken is rubbery and doesn't taste good" by the other. Hey -- we're making progress.

It's late, we had a long day, trying to fill in all the desired number of hours of What We Wanted To Do with all the required hours of What We Had To Do, so not much time to soliloquize this evening. Instead, a snapshot (har har) of our week, mostly in series of Before & After shots.

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(Before) I'm not listening... leave me alone, I'm
reading important stuff!

(After) Did someone say potato chips?

(Before) I'm not listening... leave me alone, I'm
 reading important stuff!

(After) Did someone say dessert?

(Before) Hey Teddy, let me help you get
those clodhoppers off your feet.

(During) No you don't, you villain! Leave my clodhoppers alone!

(Still during) I'll get you for this!

(After) Good Night, what a stink! (Just kidding, Teddy.)

(Before) Just minding our own business, watching
our funny movies that we made...

(After) Did someone say smile? (Oh all right, I guess we can smile for
you, after all you've done for us lately.)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

And finally: no before, no after; just a domestic scene of afternoon tranquility and chair-sharing.

10/10/10 10:10:10

So you may not believe this, but after taking down the sukkah walls and roof last week, you might have thought we would leave the framework up for the winter, but you'd be wrong!, we dismantled it on Friday (three-day weekend, thanks School District for Professional Development Days). And just in time, too -- it's raining katzes and dogses these days.

Forgot to tell you last week that for Papa's birthday he celebrated by making lunch (and most importantly, Rice Krispie® Treats™) for shul. (For his home cake, he got Lemon Poppyseed Bundtlettes, and Willie decided they were tasty.) (Side note: at a meeting just today, discussing shul food, many people at the meeting were dismayed to hear that there had been RKTs and they either hadn't been there to enjoy them, or there were none left by the time they hit the dessert table. It was agreed we need an Enforcer to keep the kids from lining up at the dessert table before kiddish has even been made!) Then he celebrated by taking us all out for Ethiopian food, despite the fact that only 50% of the dining party actually eat Ethiopian food. Lo and behold, by the time the meal was over, the percentage had been raised to 75%. Guess who? Yup, the one who is learning to dig spicy meat products. (In all fairness, I, Teddy, also tried the food, but I couldn't get past the injera -- too sour. But I tried!)

So I (T) started band at school again this week, and it was better than I'd anticipated. Oy, oy, back to the daily grind of practicing. And I (W) continue to make ever more complex polyhedra. I've really got to start cataloging these!

We had Shabbat dinner at some friends' house, it was pretty fun (tasty cheese sticks!), and their noisy babies were fun too. They (the babies) mostly liked us and wanted to show us things. One of them crawled into Mommy's skirt. The other wore Mommy's shoes and offered Mommy her own shoes. The fit? Not so good. They have a nice tradition where they take a walk in the 'hood between dinner and dessert. We thought it would be an early night since they were babies. Okay, we were wrong about that.

We continue to watch Monty Python's Flying Circus (Willie is working on his English accents; incidentally he also created a crossword puzzle today) and we are also continuing to assist our aging parents with their crossword puzzles. Also we are reading Dorothy Sayers short stories. I say, d'you think we're getting to be too Anglophilic, wot wot?

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One thing I've discovered is that Shofar blowing is much easier with a trumpet. Tekiyah...BLAZZZZ!

Whoa is me, nothing but endless homework. What's a guy to do?

Did somebody say chocolate? Donuts? BBQ sauce? Jelly beans? Something other than homework?

Amazing I still have teeth in my head after chocolate, donuts, jelly beans, etc. I guess I have to thank Dr. Nigrelle and Seven Steps to Dental Health. Blah.

Shvarim...no trumpets here. Just turn the other way and pay no attention to the guy with the horn shaped object.

Barooom, Barooooooom, Baroooooooom! Ha ha--I bet you didn't see that one coming. Time for a new alarm clock Sleeping Beauty.